I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Randomize
