My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize