So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
