Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Randomize
