We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
tell me about the fingering
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
