why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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