I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
