One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
