Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
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