He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
