Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
