I love black thongs
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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