billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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