I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize
