I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
bring money and cleavage
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
