Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
