I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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