So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
