My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
No stitches, just platelets and will power
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
