I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
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