dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
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