How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
