Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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