"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Randomize
