He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
It's shark week go big or go home
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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