haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
