she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
