ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
