I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Randomize
