hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Randomize
