Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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