i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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