She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize