Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
