strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
