So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
