Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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