I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
