If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
