We won't sleep together?
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Randomize
