oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Randomize