did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
