I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I CAN MOONWALK!
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
