Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
