I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize