quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
