I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
