What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I don't deserve a penis
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
