Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
You were trust falling into bushes
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
