Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize